Tuesday, February 3, 2009

All the single ladies...

Single ladies beware: If your married/engaged/taken friends offer to "talk to guys for you and introduce you to them," please heed my warning. This is a dangerous trap!!! Do not do as I do every single time and fall victim to their selfless offer to do this. They almost always have a hidden agenda to flirt with, dance with, take shots with cute single guys under the guise of helping out their poor single girl friend. Trust me, this is 100% true. I learned this the hard way during a recent trip to NYC.

My married friend Liz (love you Liz!!!) and I met up with two of her married friends from DC for a night out after our dinner at the lovely Artisinal (2 Park Place, New York City, NY.) Her friends couldn't wait to "help me meet guys." They both have young children and hadn't been out in months. These girls were fun, and I couldn't wait to see what the night had in store for us. We bar hopped around the Village and finally ended up at Brass Monkey, a NY hot spot for young singles. After waiting for about 15 minutes in the (literally) freezing cold weather (good thing I had my faux fur jacket to keep me warm ;), we were finally inside ready to scope out the men.

I couldn't believe how many cute guys there were inside...I had hit the jackpot. We immediately went to the bar for some additional liquid courage. Liz's friends asked me to point out the cutest guy in the room and assured me I would be chatting with him in no time. I sat down at the bar vodka tonic in hand and excitement filled my every pore as they approached Bachelor #1. Sure enough, they escorted him over to me in record time. They introduced me to him, and I started chatting him up. No sooner had I asked him where he was from, when one of Liz's friends pulled him up to her and started a deep conversation with him. EXCUSEZ-MOI??? I think not. Since I am a sweet Southern girl, I let the married woman have her fun. There were plenty of other fish in the sea that night.

The other friend, having seen what happened, asked me to find another guy I would want to talk to. I spied Bachelor #2 from across the bar and pointed him out to her. She practically ran over to him and introduced herself. After a few minutes of flirting, I mean talking, she brought him over to me. "Joe, this is Elle," she says. "Hi, Joe. How's it going?" I ask. The words had barely left my mouth when she turns her back to me and begins an animated conversation with him. Strike #2.

Thankfully a very cute Australian boy sat down next to me, and we talked for a few minutes. Unfortunately, he was there with a seemingly under aged female posse who shot a wide variety of death glares at me throughout our conversation. Strike #3...and I was out.

My three strikes happened after all 4 of us were drooling over the yummy bartender Jason. I would never actually want to date a bartender (just b/c you probably can't trust them), but they are always fun to flirt with and valuable people to know. I tried my best to talk to him, but the other married girls kept pushing me out of the conversation.

Therefore, I now adamantly REFUSE to let my married/non-single friends introduce me to guys in this type of setting. After the escapades in NY, I made a promise to myself to do my own matchmaking when I am out. Single ladies, join me now and stand up to the non-single girls who just want to have fun at YOUR expense. This is inappropriate, selfish behavior, and we need to take a stand against it. I am all about my non-single friends introducing me to guys when we are out if it is completely innocent on their part...I have just never seen it happen. And remember, every time you treat your single girl friend like this, there is another single girl out there flirting with your husband...

1 comment:

Jen k said...
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